goodnight i made you a song goodbye
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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