HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize