I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
from now on my penis is your penis
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
