I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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