That's intense
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
