Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Come on in and take your pants off
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