Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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