This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
