I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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