so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
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