DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
