we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
