I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
