big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Sorry about my life...
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
