Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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