just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
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Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
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it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I had to cum in my sink.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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