youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
