maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
