I accidentally had phone sex last night
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
