Having a random hookup so left but love u
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
