Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
