The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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