well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
