i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Randomize