You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
