Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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