I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Congratulations! We have a period
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
