hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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