Walk of Shame. In a state park.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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