He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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