You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize