Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
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