Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
