I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
