is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
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I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
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I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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