Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize