I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
