if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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