I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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