Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
