would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
