google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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