The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Randomize