Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
