she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
