we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
babies were throwing up all over the place
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
