the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Lo siento on account of my penis...
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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