just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
