Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
