I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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