I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
We had to coat check the pizza.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize
